EVERY FATHER MATTERS

Just got out of a morning consultation event looking at Fathering needs in the city. Around 80 people were there, including senior practitioners and many fathers from a wide variety of backgrounds.

I had been asked to facilitate some group work and lead different groups through the question of Education and Fathering and whether there is more that schools can do communicate with fathers (especially Non-Resident Father which is a new politically correct term I picked up!) and encourage fathers to get alongside their children in their education. It was very interesting.

The speaker who introduced the event claimed that research proved that children who had a father figure (the male role model might not be the biological father but a Grandfather, Stepfather or Uncle) involved in their upbringing were more likely to be 'successful' in life, i.e. have a stable job and a positive effect on society (pay taxes!).

As a Christian I have always believed that family was God's plan and that the fathers role was very important but it was surprising to hear that this was being suggested by a secular speaker. As I circulated the different groups asking questions I found many fathers who wanted to care for their children and be involved but feeling isolated and excluded by the state. Surely if fathering is proven as such an important role, why is it not encouraged more? If I believe fathering is so important what am I going to do to promote and encourage it? What about fathers that abuse children and have a negative effect upon their childhood and upbringing?

Lots of questions which is great to get me thinking...

A friend of mine is related to Matt O'Conner who is a key leader of Fathers 4 Justice and has just written his biography about his fight for the rights of fathers. I have been asked if I would meet with him in the New Year to chat about his work and what the role of the church should or could be. I haven't read the book but apparently it is like Gordon Ramsey with tourettes (!) and he expresses throughout the book his feeling that the church has let him and other fathers down - should be an interesting meeting!!!

Anyway let me know your thoughts, mine is:

"A father is for life, not just for conception!"

should make good bumper stickers...